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It's here again.

So, I haven't write anything for three months now. There's a lot happened during those three months. I would share but nahhhh, I don't really good at share my memories/stories to public though this is a blog that people usually write everythinggggggg. But I'm not. I get used not to share some on my stories since I have been deleting my older post. So keep it private and share some parts of it okay?

Life has been treating me ups and downs. But I'm all good. I didn't see this phase coming to me but I've accepted it with open heart. Believe me, I didn't plan any of this. To those who involve with my life, I'm truly sorry. I've hurt so many people lately, and to be honest I don't even feel anything anymore. People says things to me but I'm just being emotionless. I don't want to pay too much attention that drains my energy. I'm staying to stay calm though I'm smiling in my Instagram photo. I'm not sad anymore, I'm not happy neither but I'm trying my best to get out from this phase sooner than I think. Some people just don't understand what I want. Some people just force me to do what they want me to do. I'm being me, just do what I love. I don't want to think anymore, I'll just do it. 

Over thinking sucks. I hate people assume. I hate talking to people about things. If you don't like me, please leave. If you love me, stay. That's all that matters. 

So, in this holy Ramadhan I'm asking forgiveness every each one of you. May we have a blessed Ramadhan, spend your time wisely to Him this whole month and happy fasting!

Selamat Berpuasa :)


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Hi there.
It's the last day of 2016. It's the end of the year. ONE freaking year has passed by so quickly! It's been one hell of roller coaster ride this year. 
I was still struggling for my pregnancy early this year. I still can't accept the awkwardness of being a pregnant mom. I'm literally felt like a potato and penguin. I was so huge and gained almost 10kgs. Phew. Now, I'm still struggling with my weight. I was 48-49 kgs after I gave birth to Adam and the past five years before I got pregnant with Orked. I'm still at the 50's kgs. Hish.
Orked Mariam is 6 months old this month, She is so strong that she can pull her head so high whenever she looks at the bold colours, Didi & Friends's song, any sound of vacuum, blender etc and of course ME! Her face is like saying "mommy is here. Pick me up, please?" She still at the stage trying to grab any toys or Astro remote control nearby, but still can't get them. So, she will give up  an…